I chewed the fat a bit on Bill’s Underground Edition when, as usual, called on to have a rant about this or that or the other. You can find a link his programme on the Celtica home page.
When I was a kid I had a bit of puppy fat. Once I was in my mid-teens, I shook it off. Could be because I took up weightlifting and other exercise or just that it went. Puppy fat does. But not these days. Ive just read about a 12-year-old lad who had to go to hospital in order to be put on a diet, and his family were caught smuggling one-pound chocolate bars in to him. Thats bigger than one of those one-pound-thirty-pence-or-so Cadburys Dairy Milk. But obesitys been a factor in at least 20 child-protection cases in the last year, according to a survey dear old Auntie BBC has done by contacting 50 consultant paediatricians around the UK to ask if they believe childhood obesity can ever be a child-protection issue. Well of course it can! If I starved a child so she was a bag of bones, it would be a child-protection issue. So if I let a kid get so enormous he can walk only with a walking stick as in one case was reported am I not equally guilty of child abuse?
Get real, folks! Stop blaming everybody else. If your kids fat for no congenital reason in other words, because you have fed him too much fat and not encouraged him to exercise then thats your fault. Nothing wrong with a bit of puppy fat or a rounded figure. Goodness, but the great masters used to paint beauties whod look a bit on the plump side to us now, but they were considered gorgeous back then. Bit of something to grab hold of, you know? Or so Im told. But theres a difference between enjoying life with the occasional bit of choccy as a treat, and getting enormous! As youd expect, the touchy-feelies have entered the arena in this one. The Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health said that obesity is a public-health problem, not a child-protection issue. Oh, yes? Well whos looking after the child, Mr Paediatrics and Child Health? Not the public, but the parents, you moron. Im not blaming the kids in this. In fact I feel sorry for them. Theyre the ones whose health is at risk, and theyre the ones who get to look like shite and wont be able to pull members of the opposite sex, the same sex, a sheep, a sexy Welsh yak or whatever. And theyre the ones who, when it does come to crunch time, have to suffer the big changes their lifestyle will need to get them back to a healthy size.
I think people who want to become parents ought to be licensed. One doctor told the Beeb that as a society were lily-livered, and hed seen an obese child taken away from parents actually get back to normal bodyweight in a few months. Another said parents were killing a kid slowly because they were feeding her only chips and high-fat food. No one else was doing that, Mr Paediatrics and Child Health touchy-feely hippie tree-hugging excuse for a human being. Not the public, but the parents. Then you get manufacturers who say theyre being responsible by making some things in smaller portions. But they dont want to lose a bit of revenue for the sake of ensuring they have healthy kids wholl live long enough to continue buying their choccy, oh, no. No long-term thinking like that. What they do is sell something thats in two bits or easily breakable and say, For sharing or some such nonsense. Oh, yes, in todays me, me, me society, kids share all right: Ill share this with me, they say. Ill give the me of now half of this four-kilo bar of fondant-filled milk mush, and give the other half to the me of ten minutes hence. Nah. Manufacturers dont do responsibility, except to the bottom line. And its the bottom lines that are getting bigger. A bit of parent power might make them and their own kids think a bit. Government initiatives dont seem to cut the mustard. You might say theyre a fat lot of good.